Van Tango

Former Stone Roses frontman Ian Brown has dealt a massive blow to fans by ruling out a reunion - ever. This is despite each of the original band members — Ian, guitarist John Squire, drummer Alan Wren and bass player Gary Mounfield — being offered £1million by a promoter to reform. Come on. All of us Roses peeps still wanna be adored. That can't be the hardest thing in the world, aye?

Oasis are lending their track 'Lyla' to a computer game. The song will feature on the soundtrack to EA Sports FIFA 06 along with the likes of Royksopp’s ‘Follow My Ruin’, The Departure's 'Be My Enemy' and Bloc Party’s ‘Helicopter’. Composed of 39 songs in all, the soundtrack aims to give an international feel.
The game will be released towards the end of this month. With those kind of tunes in a game like that, the players will have 'little thoughts' of ending a session, thus having 'mucky fingers' from over-playing. Winning Eleven should incorporate some cool songs too.

Jennifer Aniston has agreed to a TV interview where she is tipped to pull no punches towards Brad Pitt.
Although Hollywood's golden couple have so far restrained themselves from being particularly hostile or critical towards each other via the media, Aniston has agreed to a TV interview, where she is expected to speak her mind. A source said : "She's spoken about the split to a magazine but feels she can explain her side of the story better on TV." Aaah..let it all out. Let the Rachel Green 'monster' emerge if you can. Watch this space.

Michael Owen Specials from bookmakers :
- 8/15 Owen to stay at Newcastle longer than Graeme Souness

This is a very interesting offer to consider.

Punk Legend John Lydon has warned Babyshambles frontman Pete Doherty on his ongoing battle with hard drugs. Johnny Rotten, member of seminal 70's punk rebels The Sex Pistols, has come out and warned Doherty that his drug use could lead to his premature death. Lydon is worried that the hedonistic singer-songwriter will follow the same path as his former bandmate Sid Vicious, who died of a heroin overdoes in 1979 at the age of just 21. Lydon says, "All I can say is good luck to him. It's a hard life anyway. He's made a decision to play this drugs games. But I haven't seen many survivors. And I don't want to see him become another stupid rock death.
"Pete - calm down a little and start checking yourself. You're not impressing anyone. You're depressing."
Firstly, Damon Albarn wants to create a 'Make Doherty History' campaign. Then, Liam G spotted him amongst the crowd as a huge inflatable wiener. Too make it worse, Miss Charlotte-y Church called him a 'wanker' and told him to go home. Lol.. Now The Rotten Man has spoken about his views. Let's hope we don't see any 'Who Killed Bambi-shambles' headlines - ever.

Speaking of Damon, the Blur frontman has hit out at the Live 8 concerts for spreading the myth Africa is a hopeless cause. He was disillusioned by the way the live extravaganzas - intended to raise awareness of poverty in Africa - overlooked African musicians. He said: "Yet again it looks like Africans are failing. And yet again the missionary zeal of the West is blind to the fantastic potential and sheer lust for life that exists in Africa." Seems that he is not 'tender' about the whole affair. Maybe he can give some good ideas and not 'beetlebum'-ing away in cartoon land...

--One often contradicts an opinion when what is uncongenial is really the tone in which it was conveyed.--

Robbie Williams is reportedly set to star in a remake of 70s classic 'Saturday Night Fever'. The heartthrob singer is hotly tipped to play snake-hipped Tony Manero in the film, which is reportedly being remade by the Bee Gees. .The group will own their back catalogue of hits this year and are said to be planning a £20 million remake of the disco movie as their first project. Robin and Barry Gibb are said to believe Robbie would be perfect as Tony Manero, who was played by Travolta. A friend of the band said : "They have always wanted to remake the film and bring out a more modern version. "And Robbie is the ideal candidate to play Tony - he can sing, dance, is a good-looking lad and has loads of charisma." A supreme-ly good choice there. What you doin' and you’re laying on your back (on your back)... Would the hairstyle be the same too?

James Bond bosses are said to be frantically searching for a new star after dumping Pierce Brosnan. The 52-year-old actor - who played the title role in four Bond films - was officially dropped from the franchise earlier this month. Although filming on the new movie 'Casino Royale' is due to start in January, producers haven't found a star to play the dashing spy. Several stars - including Hugh Jackman, Colin Farrell, and Ewan McGregor - have been considered but casting directors can't agree on who should step into 007's shoes. John Cena, anyone?
No special weapons needed. He can finish them villians in a street fight, ending it with an 'F U'. And this movie is associated with gam-'bling'.. Bling = Doc. of Thugonomics.

Ashlee Simpson has got a tattoo to celebrate finishing her second album. The sexy singer has had the word 'love' etched onto the inside of her left wrist and cherries tattooed onto her ankle. She revealed: "I got 'love' because, for me, love is the most important thing. So I can give people love." Meanwhile, the blonde beauty is planning to celebrate her upcoming 21st birthday with lots of alcohol. Ashlee - who will become the legal US drinking age on October 3 - revealed: "I want so much wine and champagne. I just got a new house and I have the wine rack. So I want to fill that up. "As far as clothes and diamonds, I don't need that." OK. Two tattoos are enough. Don't start putting keywords from the 'autobiography' on your skin. That would definitely be a 'sorry' sight.

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Walk home, come down, retreat to sleep!
Wake up, go out again, repeat!
Walk home, come down, retreat to sleep!
Hook up, again this time, next week!
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